Image courtesy of Rochelle Wisoff-Fields
Beautiful women with Hollywood smiles thrust autograph books towards him but it’s me he wants. Mum said I was too fat. Too ugly. That nobody would ever love me but she was wrong.
He does. Tenderly he urged me to board without him, to ‘protect’ me from the throngs of fans.
‘Anything to declare?’ I am asked as I shift his guitar case from one hand to another.
Barking.
Snapping.
Dogs scratching at the case.
‘You’d better come with me, Miss.”
‘It’s not mine.’ I protest but as he walks past me without a second glance I realise, neither is he.
It’s been a busy few weeks. My fourth psychological thriller, The Date, was published a few days ago and has already hit the UK top 40 and the US top 20. Thanks to all who supported. Publication day was spent in London where I was fundraising for Parkinson’s Disease, a charity close to my heart.
The Date is centred around Prosopagnosia/Face Blindness & for my YouTube channel I interviewed Hannah Read who has the most severe reported case in the UK to ask her what it’s really like when everyone looks like a stranger. You can watch that here and find The Date on Amazon here.
Friday Fictioneers is a weekly 100 word photo challenge inspired by a photo prompt. Hop on over to host Rochelle’s blog to read the other entries or join in!
fabricating fiction 
Killer last line
Thanks Neil.
Excellent last line. I saw where it was going, but that didn’t make the ride any more comfortable. Poor girl.
Thanks Sandra. Poor girl indeed.
I liked how you built this, a young woman’s dreams collapsing into a nightmare.
Thanks. There will always be those that naive.
Excellent build-up, even though the ending was inevitable from the start. Loved it. And congratulations on the success of your book.
Thanks so much!
Congratulations on another bestseller!
Mum always knows best, hopefully she can afford a good lawyer! 🙂
Think she’ll need one. Thanks Iain!
Oh that poor girl! I hope she gets to prove it was his case. Sometimes you have to believe your parents.
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
I think she’ll be ok. Thanks for reading!
Dear Louise,
Poor kid. In one moment her dreams are snuffed. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
PS Congrats on The Date.
Thanks Rochelle on both counts.
Sometimes you’ve got to ask the very important question, “What does he really see in me?”
Aww – what’s on the inside hopefully.
Not for this guy apparently. He just needed a mule.
Great last line. Sort of a variation of the “does your dog bite?” joke, too.
Ooh don’t know that?
The dog bites the person and he gets mad and says I thought you said your dog didn’t bite. The person says he doesn’t, but this isn’t my dog.
Hehe my son will love that!
🙂
Oh, that’s just despicable! I hope he gets his, very soon!
Me too!
Ah, bless her – she’s been taken for a ride and now has to pay for it. I love how you set up your character in the opening, Louise, show us how vulnerable she was to a bit of smarm and a little kindness. Great story.
And very many congratulations on the new release – you’re amazing!
Thanks Lynn. It’s so nice to write something short again!
Wonderfully done, Louise.
That piece of sh*t… Poor naive girl…
He’ll get his!
Ouch… sometimes mistakes comes quickly… hope it was not in a country with death penalty
Hadn’t thought of that!
Oh dear. Never trust a rock star 🙂
Indeed!
I’ve missed your stories! This one came in with a bang. Poor girl. I think I’ve been there. It ain’t pretty and you captured that well. Congrats on your new book.
Thanks Alicia. I’ve missed being here!
Nicely crafted. Your book sounds good too! Good luck with it!
Thanks very much.
These type of drugs are so evil, nearly as bad as this guitar player.
Absolutely!
Well done. As someone else commented, Poor girl & killer last line.
Thanks Christine.
Oh no, another naive hopeful being swayed by the fleeting glance of a handsome musician. This is exactly why the announcements at the airport tell you not to carry anything for strangers! But youth is so eager to please…
They are.
Lovely tale! 😀
Thanks for reading!
Most welcome! 😀
The last line really got to me. Poor girl. It’s heartbreaking. She wanted so much to believe that he loved her but it all been a sham.
Love hurts!
Oh no, what an awful and very believable tale. That last line is fantastic.
Thank you Ellie.
Loved this story. I was hoping you were going to say it was from your new book. Congrats, on yet another publication!
Thanks Dawn!
Great character piece.
Thanks
poor girl, she’d need a good lawyer to get out this situation.
Indeed!
Such a full tale, the back story of their relationship hinted at, his true nature revealed as he walks on by. The single word lines are really effective at slowing the action down and helping to paint the scene.
Much appreciated Sarah Ann.
You built the story well with a great twist. Poor girl. You hear of this kind of thing happening and I always wonder “How?” But, some snakes are crafty. Congratulations on the publication of your book!
It’s sadly too common. Thanks Brenda.
Oops. She fell for the glitter and he got a mule.
She did!
There’s a reason the airports announce that you should not let anyone touch your luggage or accept bags from anyone else. Of course, they say nothing about supposed boyfriends.
Congrats on your best seller status!
Absolutely Alice. Thanks so much.
Beautifully told story.
Thank you Jilly.
Congratulations on publishing. I was going to give you some writing tips, but it seems like you don’t need them.
I haven’t figured out the key to success in the publishing industry, sometimes I think it’s just who you know, a little bit of good timing and a lot of luck. My teacher taught me about Kairos, but I haven’t been able to fully adopt it. Writing comes naturally to me, but I emulate classical authors more than writing what is new. Like, my new stuff is like Longfellow, though I hadn’t read a lick of him until yesterday. And if my luck would have it, he’s not well received by critics anymore. I suppose that’s the story of my life, right? Professional, with nobody to read it.
Always need writing tips! Don’t think I’ll ever be done learning. I think all the things you’ve mentioned for publishing success but a good story & hard work too. Good luck!
Thanks. I’m a hard worker. I have 14 books I’ve written. I can go back and reread my stories after a few years, so I assume they’re alright.
The only thing I would have done differently was state that the narrator was at an airport or train station within the first two sentences. Maybe a three word image. Other than that, it was excellent. 🙂
Also, the ambiguity of the “Dogs scratching at the case” was a good literary device. Could it be airport security dogs, or could it be the crowd? I think it does well for a metaphor, but a setting is like a thesis statement in writing an essay. It helps orient the reader within the world. I didn’t come to that conclusion myself. A professor at my community college had to tell me, but it’s really helped me write.
I really loved the emotion in this. There aren’t very many words, and yet you get so much out of it. Beautiful.
Thanks very much Kenzie!