Image J Hardy Carroll
‘Wanna play hide and seek?’
‘We can’t. We have to wait here while Mama says goodbye to Grandpa.’
‘How can she say goodbye when he’s not here anymore?’
‘Mama says he’s watching over us.’
‘He can see everything we do?’
‘Yep.’
‘Even if we’re naughty?’
‘Yep.’
‘Will he be cross?’
‘No. He’s an angel now and angels don’t get cross. But he’ll probably tell Santa Claus if we’re bad.’
‘Grandpa knows Santa?’
‘Sure. That’s why he always disappeared when Santa came with the presents. He was feeding the reindeers cos he knows them.’
‘I’m gonna be so good this year.’
Written for Friday Fictioneers. A 100 word story inspired by a photo prompt. Read the other entries here.
fabricating fiction 
Dear Louise,
Realistic childish banter makes this one believable.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks Rochelle.
The dead can see the living. Nobody becomes an angel, though those who get to heaven get to hang with the angels. This is such a nice illustration of how to explain to young uns about death.
Thanks Larry. Young minds usually find a way to make things make sense.
A lovely child’s eye view of death and Christmas. Good one.
Thanks very much Sandra.
Lovely. And answers a lot of questions for me.
That’s how Santa knows…
Oh the things we teach our children!
Good piece.
Thanks Mick. I think they’ve come to their own jumbled conclusions here.
Through the eyes of a child. Very believable conversation.
Thanks very much.
Thank you. I really needed the joy and innocence of children at play on this day.
You’re welcome. Thanks for reading 🙂
Very cute about Grandpa feeding the reindeer.
Thanks Deborah.
Great to see you thought of angels too (before I did, though I didn’t know at the time). This is a lovely story.
Thanks very much.
I thought this was really fun. Great dialogue, and a convincing one between two children. C – I think I would’ve enjoyed a little bit of description, although the story is great as is. I think “Cos” could be more correctly written as a contraction of “because” by writing, ” ’cause “. A very enjoyable story!
Thanks very much for the feedback.
Sweet and innocent. The children’s POV was perfect.
Tracey
Thanks Tracey.
I love it!
Thanks Dawn.
Lovely childhood banter. “Out of the mouths of babes…” Smiling I am to read your tale.
Thank you Lillian.
I love this. The children’s view of things while Mama does what adults do.
Thanks Dale.
Thanks for a delightfully light take on this weeks prompt. I could hear these children banter back and forth.
Thanks Alicia
This is touching, Louise. Kids find a way to talk about death, too. And they seem reassured in the end here.
They do. Thanks Amy.
This rang true. The dialogue was in a child’s voice and you did it extremely well. I can’t come up with anywhere that you can improve on this one.
Much appreciated Irene.
Sweet story. I can imagine two little kiddies having such a conversation!
Thanks Ali.
Lovely!!
Thanks.
So sweet. Lovely story and nice dialogue!
Thank you Graham.
This is so sweet, loved it!
Thanks very much.
Children can make up stories faster and cuter than any of us adults here at FF. Looks like you channelled the inner child today . Nice one.
My inner child often takes over! Thanks.
Totally believable young voices.
What a well written story this is! Lovely!
Thanks so much.
This is very cute. Even when they figure out the truth eventually, the fairytale magic will stay with them. C– the children’s voices are great, works for me.
Thanks very much.
A lovely bit of fun 🙂
Thanks Helen.
The dialogue is great. Adorable and innocent children’s view of things 😀
Thanks for reading Jan.
I appreciate how you use dialogue to tell the story – something I can try to do sometimes.
Lily
Is fascinating how irrelevant death is to us at a young age. How life changes. Perhaps when our own mortality comes into question.
We don’t tend to dwell on things so much do we? Thanks for reading.
Cute dialogue. Enjoyed it. Randy
I’m going to try to be good, too. (we’ll see how long that lasts!)
Santa’s watching!
i feel a certain sense of poignancy sprinkled around the story. it was amazing how you did it.
Thanks very much.
This was a very cute piece. I loved it.
Thanks Joseph.
You captured the voice beautifully! Loved it!
Thanks so much Yolanda.
Thank you for visiting my FF. I focused on the children as well. They caught my eye when I first saw the photo. Your story shows that children have a myriad of emotions.
Have a great weekend ..
Isadora 😎
Children are such an inspiration. Thanks for visiting.
Your welcome … 😎
Louise, nice job with the flow of dialogue and the realistic glimpse into a child’s mind, regarding death and magic… one in the same for so many kids. Nice job!
Thanks Dawn 🙂
C – the voices of this pair are wonderful – very engaging and sweet.
My only criticism would be about the sentence about the reindeer. It’s wordiness seems to break up the rhythm of the rest.
Good emphasis in the last line.
A lovely piece.
Thanks Sarah Ann – I’ll take a little look at that sentence. Your feedback is much appreciated.
The children’s voices work very well Louise, and I love the way their logic explains everything. Very thoughtful piece
Thanks very much.
Really sweet story. It seems the children have worked things out for themselves. Well done, Louise. 🙂 — Suzanne
Makes sense. What with the overload and focus on Elves’ working conditions, Santa probably needs to make more trips during the year now.
Don’t forget minimum wage 🙂