Flash Fiction – The longest night

 

keck

I didn’t think I’d miss you, but the bed feels big and empty.

I turn over my damp pillow and wipe my wet cheeks. My feet are like ice, I wish I could place my soles against your warm legs.

I curl into the mattress and pull the duvet up to my chin. I don’t remember the bedroom having so many shadows.

I still sleep on the left, I could move to the right now or starfish in the middle. I could drop toast crumbs in the bed. I could do lots of things, but I don’t.

I didn’t think I would miss you, but I do.

 

Written for Friday Fictioneers. A 100 words inspired by a photo prompt. Read the other entries here

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72 thoughts on “Flash Fiction – The longest night

  1. Good piece. My only crit would be the sentence with a “damp pillow” and “wet cheeks”. Feels like two ways to tell us the same thing i.e. she’s been crying. See you next week!

  2. This was me after I kicked my husband out…but ultimately it was the right decision. You described the feelings perfectly. (I slept better once I got a new bedroom set!)

  3. she better moves those cold feet before she gets hypothermia. oh, did i spell it right? should it be hypnothermia? all i want to say is wallowing in self-pity is toxic.

  4. So sad and reflective, and yet, I can’t help thinking that she is just regretting details. Sometimes this helps evaluating if the details alone are worth the whole package.

Constructive criticism appreciated

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