Mary refills my wine as I push pieces of fillet around my plate. I search for the words to end my marriage.
She looks so damn beautiful tonight. Yesterday as my secretary wrapped her long legs around me I wanted nothing more than divorce. Today I’m not so sure.
‘Mary….’.
‘I’m leaving you.’
Hot lust and fear dance through me exploding in a fire of desperation. Sweat pricks my skin. I reach out to my wife overturning my glass. The white tablecloth stains blood red.
Her eyes are bright with tears. ‘Do you think I didn’t know?’
Shame engulfs me.
Written for Friday Fictioneers. A 100 word story inspired by a photo prompt.
fabricating fiction 
Good one. Small crit…I wouldn’t bother with a clunky word like ‘interjects’. The fact that she has spoken shows she’s interrupted the other speaker i.e. I’d go with:
‘I’m leaving you,’ she says.
🙂
Thanks Paul. Always happy to receive advice 🙂
Good for Mary! More than shame should engulf the straying b*&%*@d!
Wow! Good twists and turns. Great stuff!
Thanks 🙂
Ah.. men always think they can deceive a clever woman.. i hope he ends up alone.
He was going to end up poisoned but ran out of words!
I love the white tablecloth stains blood red. Almost an omen for what is coming his way. Very good take on the prompt my friend 🙂
Thanks very much Lyn.
Your story fulfilled your title but in a different way than the reader expects from the way you started. Good job.
Maybe you could say “Mary…” and then “interjects” (or possible “interrupts”) works a bit better. Seems that he was probably going to say something after her name and the dots would show that. Just a thought. What do you think?
janet
Good idea Janet. Thanks.
well he should be ashamed of himself… i love the tiny details like the spilled wine on the white tablecloth…
Only because he got caught I think. Thanks.
i hope the marriage can still be repaired. he should be entitled to one last chance.
I think this is not his first time.
Holy Smokes! What a GREAT short story. I want to read the rest of the book. … Well really, I’ll just turn to the end of the book to see if he is still alive. … Very good writing with emotional tones and twists. … I like it.
Thanks Mike. He was going to die but didn’t want her to go to Jail.
Too bad lack of word-space doesn’t allow the addition of, “And taking you to the cleaners.” after “I’m leaving you.” A well told cautionary tale. 🙂
Does anyone want to tell an old dinosaur how to insert single quotation marks?? Do I access Symbols?
Ah that will happen I’m sure.
My single marks are below the double on the same key. What device/keyboard are you using?
You can’t begin to understand how stupid I feel. Below the quotation marks on my Logitech keyboard… is a comma, which always faces down. If I had only thought to place it at the beginning of a quotation, I assume it would point up – just like the quotation marks do. Thanx for helping to wake an old man up. 😕
Tee hee. You’re welcome.
Dear Louise,
I love it that his wife beat him to the punch. I honestly felt nothing for him and felt that he had it coming. Although I agree about ‘interjected’ I still say well done.
shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks Rochelle. He gets what he deserves.
What a great story. And the dialog works perfectly.
Thanks so much 🙂
Wow, such a strong story; wonderful dialogue. But I can’t help but add my tuppence worth…I’m not sure about the ‘hot lust’ dancing through him at that exact point. I can see that he’s lustful before – fancying his wife again, thinking about his secretary, but just after she says ‘I’m leaving all’ I would have thought all feelings of lust would vanish instantly.
Claire
Fantastic! The twists, sharp dialogue and storytelling are just wonderful. “Hot lust and fear…” Doesn’t that just nail it! The forbidden fruit, that which we can’t have, always seems so much more desirable. Love this writing!
Thanks very much. The grass is always (deceptively) greener!
And that ain’t fiction! 😉
The decision has been made for him – the woman always knows (so I’ve heard)! Very well written, great story 🙂
Thanks very much. It’s out of his hands now.
Very well told. I can picture him feeling the shame. Although, he should feel a lot more, in my opinion. Good for Mary!
Thanks Shailaja.
Great shifts of emotion and control from one character to the other. The image of him knocking the glass of wine and it spilling on the table cloth adds such a strong visual element to the dialogue.
Thank you Siobhan
My favorite aspect was the spilled wine foreshadowing. Great piece.
Thanks. Much appreciated.
I love this, very well done
Dee
Thanks for visiting 🙂
Hi Louise, good one! All these men around should read this and learn the lesson.
Thanks Elizabeth!
Very well written. Loved the tiny details in there. He wasn’t ashamed looking at his beautiful wife but only after he was caught. Good one!
Thanks very much 🙂
Louise, Good story. It looks like he wasn’t paying attention all this time. Just how dumb did he think she was? The secretary was probably even wearing perfume and lipsitck that stuck to his clothes. He was living in a dream world. Good for his wife. I’m surprised the wine didn’t end up dumped on his head. If she divorces him, I hope she socks it to him. I agree that he’s probably cheated before, and she just can’t take it any more. He may have a problem he needs professional help with. If so, he’ll very likely end up alone. Well written. 🙂 —Susan
Thanks Susan. I think there had been many signs and much wallet checking! The wine was going to contain cyanide if I had more words. That will be another story ……
Dear Louise, All she needs is a ‘no questions asked’ Apothecary Shop and she could give him a stomach ache that would last a long, long, time! Wonderful, wonderful story. Like I told my husband when we first got married “I won’t ever be a divorcee – maybe a widow though. He understood and we have laughed about it several times over the 44 years of marriage. Good job Louise, Good Job! Nan 🙂
That’s funny Nan. Thanks 🙂
He had that coming but probably his ego blindsided him. And I like how his wife beat him to the punch.
Had it coming a long time I think. Thanks for reading.
What a jerk! He was certainly aware of his own moment to moment feelings but seems to give no thought to his wife’s 😦
I was chuckling over you running of words before you could do him in and Nan’s comment.
Ellespeth
Me too. I can feel another story coming on …..
Such a full tale in so little words.
Great story, I’m glad she beat him to it!
Me too Rachel. Thanks 🙂
Ah well, marriages come and go… I do hope the tablecloth isn’t ruined, though. A good tablecloth never lets you down!
Tee hee. Shame the wine was red 🙂
Powerful stuff and an excellent take on the prompt.
Thank you Patrick.