Friday Fictioneers – Hidden Cargo

Urine and sweat hung in the air. The smell of a new life. I gripped my sister’s slick hand. Stomachs rumbled in the darkness. It could have been hours or days since we had eaten. Time had ceased to exist the moment we traded our savings for promises, exchanging hope for lies.

The truck stopped. I was propelled forward. Blood mingled with perspiration, dripping into my gaping mouth.

The shutters sprang open. Light burned my eyes.

‘Girls we only want girls.’

We were herded out like animals and huddled beneath the neon Sex Club sign.

My new home. The land of the free.

Written for Friday Fictioneers. A short story inspired by a photo prompt.



63 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Hidden Cargo

  1. Dear Louise, This is a wonderful story. Human Trafficking is horrible and is running rampid through the loose excuse of Coyotes kidnapping girls. I’m so sorry for them and believe me, I’ve called 911 more than once when I saw something suspicious. Great job! Nan 🙂

  2. Great story and very true-to-life. There have been stories in the news the last couple of days about human trafficking and people coming across the channel in the back of a lorry.
    A terrible crime.

  3. I love how the first two sentences could have been describing all sorts of places – I was thinking a labour room at first, and in a way it was, but not how I was expecting. What an awful thing human trafficing is. A great story to highlight it, and well written.

  4. Louise, This is a horror story, but sadly not fiction. Good people in the world need to keep up the pressure to stop this evil. Sadly, there’s a lot of money to be made, and so the horrible practice continues. A hard-hitting story and well written. —Susan

  5. This is very strong – it was difficult to hit the like button because of its contents and the powerful way you portray the horrendous situation the girls are in. Well done.

  6. I particularly like this line, which I think really sums up the desperation the character feels: “Time had ceased to exist the moment we traded our savings for promises” – because the terrible situation she finds herself in is unchanging and has no end in sight.

Constructive criticism appreciated

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